Ten Reasons My Children Have Not Put Their Shoes On Yet

We needed to leave for school ten minutes ago and they still don’t have their shoes on…

1. They Needed To Find A Toy To Take To School

Little girl's shoes with a pink toy inside

You’re not allowed to take a toy to school, and no you can’t take one on the journey just for me to carry back for you.

2. They Needed To Get One Last Drink

Young girl drinking milk

And yet when you had your breakfast your drink was barely touched.

3. They Needed The Toilet After Having A Drink

Child sat on toilet with bare feet

You went three minutes ago!

4. They Can’t Find Their Shoes

Bare Feet In A Pile Of Shoes

They’re right there, on the shoe shelf, where they are every morning.

5. They Needed To Solve A Debate With Their Sibling

Two sisters fighting and pulling hair

For crying out loud it really doesn’t matter if the middle colour of the traffic light is called orange or yellow. None of this makes any difference to the fact that you need to put your shoes on.

6. They Just Needed To Draw A Quick Picture

Sports Shoes With A Backpack, Books, Pencils, On The Background.

Seriously? All weekend I have offered you the opportunity to draw and you have refused in favour of your games console. NOW you want to draw something?

7. They Put The Wrong Shoes On

Child's sandals on a white background

Why are you wearing your sandals? Firstly, it’s January and we don’t live in the southern hemisphere. Secondly, those sandals don’t even fit you anymore. Thirdly, you are wearing your school uniform and it’s a school day. That’s a pretty big clue as to what kind of shoes you need right now.

8. They Remembered They Needed Something For School

Hand holding ruller, making of diy project

Sorry, but if you had told me yesterday that you needed to bring in a model Roman fort made from cereal boxes I may have been able to help you, but as we are now late for school I’m afraid it’s too late. Put your shoes on.

9. They Had To Tell Me Something

Black school shoe on white background

I’m sure your joke that you made up about Fortnite is absolutely hilarious, but right now what would really make me happy is if we left for school on time.

10. They Didn’t Realise It Was Time To Put Their Shoes On

Close up of frustrated mother

I have only asked you, what, about 36 times?