Ten Signs You Are A Parent To A Toddler

Toddlers are strange creatures. One moment they can bring great joy with their sloppy kisses and attempts at singing nursery rhymes. The next moment you can find yourself crying in frustration at having to mop the floor for the tenth time that morning when it’s only 8am. If you recognise any of the points below, then you have probably got one of these odd beings.

1) You frequently use the words “Don’t lick the window / stone / bathtub / plant.”

Toddler with tongue on window
2) There is no room in your handbag, as it’s stuffed with packets of wet wipes, half eaten boxes of raisins, spare dummies, toy cars, and used tissues.

Mum's Handbag
3) You have previously used a plate / a tea towel / some newspaper / your bare hands to catch vomit without batting an eyelid.

Child about to vomit
4) You know all the names of all the characters in Chuggington, as well as their back-stories, and occasionally find yourself humming the theme tune out loud.

Child with remote
5) You are perpetually worried about the consequences of accidently leaving a stuffed animal behind during trips out.

Teddy bear in car seat
6) You consider 7am to be a lie in.

Family waking up
7) You use a visit to the toilet to grasp a few moments of peace and think nothing of finding yourself joined by an audience.
Smiling child behind a door
8) Every car journey MUST be accompanied by a rendition of “The Wheels On The Bus”.

Toddler crying in rear view mirror
9) You assess every new home you visit for potential hazards and breakables.

Messy child on floor
10) When you see a parent struggling with a toddler meltdown in public you are silently cheering for joy that it’s not you… this time.

Toddler meltdown