![\"Geeky](\"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/Geeky-toddler-boy.jpg\")
<\/p>\nLiving with a three year old can be both hilarious and frustrating. My son, Thomas, has not stopped talking ever since he learned how to string more than two words together, and as a somewhat introverted person who values peace and quiet, this can often drive me slightly batty, especially after the tenth \u201cwhy\u201d in a conversation. On the other hand, his endless need for conversation has led to some very funny, and sometimes embarrassing moments that I\u2019m sure many other parents can relate to. Here are some of my favourites.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cMummy, Thomas The Tank Engine is like me, Thomas The Boy.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cWell, yes, you have the same name.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cExcept Thomas The Tank Engine doesn\u2019t wear socks.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas (Shouting, in a park full of people): \u201cMummy, look at my really, really, big dick!\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cStick. It\u2019s a stick. Can you say sssss?\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas (Very loudly, in a public toilet cubicle.): \u201cOh Mummy, where is your willy? Where is your wee-wee coming from?”<\/p>\n
Me (After much pestering): \u201cFine, you can take your sticker book with you in the car, but I cannot help you with the stickers because I will be driving.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cMummy, I love you, but I don\u2019t love you anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cDaddy, daddy?\u201d<\/p>\n
Pregnant Me: \u201cDaddy is at work.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cNo, I wanted to talk to the daddy of the baby in your tummy.\u201d<\/p>\n
NB: I\u2019m happily married, there is no infidelity, and I\u2019m fairly certain that baby number two isn\u2019t the result of immaculate conception.<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cMummy, can you build me something special with my LEGO bricks?\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cI\u2019ve already built you several things this morning and you keep telling me that they are wrong. Why don\u2019t you build something instead?\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cNo, you do it Mummy. Don\u2019t worry, I won\u2019t let you get it wrong.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas (In the bath): \u201cArrrrgh, arrrgh what\u2019s this on me? What is it? Can you get it off? \u2026 Oh, it\u2019s just my nipple.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas (To another Mum in the park, with no context): \u201cMy Daddy has gone to the hospital to get some chocolate!\u201d<\/p>\n
(Daddy was sat happily at home.)<\/p>\n
Thomas (Loudly, in the public changing rooms at the swimming pool): \u201cDaddy, is that your willy? Can I touch it?\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas (Whilst doing a wee on the roadside in the middle of nowhere): \u201cI\u2019m giving the plants a lovely drink.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me (With my new-born nephew): \u201cHere you go, Thomas. Look, this is your new cousin, Benjamin.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cNooooo, I don\u2019t want it. Take it away. Take it away!”<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cI love you Mummy and you Daddy.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cAww, I love you too.\u201d<\/p>\n
(Husband remains silent, engrossed in something else.)<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cI said, I love you Mummy AND YOU DADDY!”<\/p>\n
Thomas (in a panic): \u201cMummy, mummy, my sound has gone!\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cUm, what?\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cMy sound has gone!”<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cErm, OK. Can you hear me?\u201d<\/p>\n
Thomas: \u201cNo, my sound has gone, I can\u2019t hear you!\u201d<\/p>\n
(It took me ten minutes to realise he meant that his ears had popped after yawning.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Living with a three year old can be both hilarious and frustrating. My son, Thomas, has not stopped talking ever since he learned how to string more than two words together, and as a somewhat introverted person who values peace and quiet, this can often drive me slightly batty, especially after the tenth \u201cwhy\u201d in a conversation. On the other hand, his endless need for conversation has led to some very funny, and sometimes embarrassing moments that I\u2019m sure many other parents can relate to. Here are some of my favourites. 1) Man Versus Machine Thomas: \u201cMummy, Thomas The Tank <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":508,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,22],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/507"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=507"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/507\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3202,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/507\/revisions\/3202"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/508"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=507"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=507"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mumblog.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=507"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}