You might have started the summer holidays on a high note. No more late night laundry loads when you realise your child has no clean uniform for the next day. No more smelly PE kits. No more battles about homework. Lots of time together as a family. Fun days out. Sounds great. Then reality starts to hit.
Craft Activities
Week One
”Come on kids, lets try to recreate this amazing Pinterest creation I found. I have spent a small fortune on craft packs from Baker Ross, plus I have all these brand new Crayola pens. I have also stocked up the craft cupboard with card, stickers, and those fluffy pom pom balls that come with every craft pack but no one ever seems to know what to do with them.”
Week Six
”No, you are not getting the paints out again. The dining table still hasn’t recovered from last time. Can’t you just watch TV instead?
Day Trips
Week One
”OK kids, on Monday we’re off to Legoland so we can spend the day in queues. On Tuesday, I have booked us into a special craft session at the local museum. On Wednesday, I thought we could go for a really long walk with a picnic even though last time that happened you both whined the entire way and I slipped on a cowpat. On Thursday, we’re going to meet up with five other overly enthusiastic families at a soft play centre. Then on Friday, I thought we would risk our limbs and test out my pelvic floor at the newly opened trampoline park.”
Week Six
”I’m just going to google how much screen time is OK for kids.”
Food
Week One
”We’re going to spend the summer getting healthier. I’m going to teach you how to cook nutritious meals from scratch. You’re finally going to get the five-a-day you need. We can also do some baking sessions together as a treat.”
Week Six
”Fishfingers, chips, and beans ok for tea again?”
Play Dates
Week One
”No, of course I don’t mind your children coming to a playdate at my house three days in a row. Ben’s Mum and Olivia’s Mum are dropping them off here tomorrow, as well. I honestly find it easier when my two have their friends over because they largely entertain themselves. I thought we could get the paddling pool out and I can take them all to the park.”
Week Six
”Sorry, Monday doesn’t work for us. Nor Tuesday. Wednesday isn’t looking good either. Thursday and Friday we have something on. Might be able to squeeze something in if you have the kids at your place on Friday afternoon? It is so lovely for them to spend time together and I’m sure your children must be fed up of coming to ours by now. No?”
The Great Outdoors
Week One
”So, kids, this Change4Life leaflet you brought home from school says you need an hour of activity a day. This summer we’re going to all get fit and active and make the most of the weather. I’ve signed us up for some tennis lessons and I’ve booked us into a campsite this weekend. The weather forecast isn’t looking too promising but that is no excuse for being a couch potato.”
Week Six
”Can you really not find anything on Netflix that you would like to watch?”
Learning Opportunities
Week One
”I want to make sure you keep up your reading and writing and practice. If a teacher can do it every day with 20 children, I’m sure I can do it once or twice a week with two children. I’ve bought some reading books and some literacy and numeracy workbooks. I thought we could do a project of some kind to learn about over the summer. Maybe visit some museums, that sort of thing.”
Week Six
”What do you mean, you have homework due in next week? Why didn’t you tell me this five weeks ago?”
Alcohol
Week One
”It’s 9pm and I’m just going to treat myself to a lovely G&T. I’ve deserved it after braving the queues at Legoland. Just the one though, we’re up at six am tomorrow to walk up a big hill.”
Week Six
”If I bake some lemon breakfast muffins with frosting made with gin, that doesn’t really count as drinking at 8am does it?”
The School Run
Week One
”Thank goodness that’s over for a while. I certainly don’t miss the stress of having to get two children up, washed, dressed, and fed in time to leave the house by 8.30, and all the arguments that go with it.”
Week Six
”Thank goodness it’s only seven more sleeps until school begins. What do you mean it’s actually eight sleeps? There’s an inset day? A whole day? Really? You sure it’s not just half a day or something? They can’t do this, can they? I’m going to write to my MP.”
